Friday, November 18, 2005

Goblet of Fire

Harry Potter just doesn't feel the same to me anymore and I miss that.

When the book, The Goblet of Fire was released back in 2003, I stood in line at midnight with nieces and nephews; we just couldn't stand the excitement anticipating reading that big fat book- who could? we heard it was the longest book in the series- so many adventures ot look forward to! It was like Christmas Eve, or even better. We-just-could-not-wait! My niece and I had a sleepover that night. We should have been catching up on old times but we just had to read a few chapters of this new book.

The 4th movie, The Prisoner of Azkaban was released on June 4, 2004. I had planned on going to the midnite viewing as I had all previous releases of Harry Potter movies. But on May 31, 2004, my life was turned upside down when I was notified that my only child was killed in Iraq. Seeing a movie that week was just nowhere on my radar. Seeing any movie these days mostly feels like too much effort.

When life hands you this kind of card, it shouldn't surprise you how it affects you, how your life changes. But how things sneak up on you and you find how your life has changed, that is the scary and surprising part. Why would one not be able to see a silly movie? Because Ken always laughed at me when he knew I would be standing in line at midnite to see Harry Potter! "MA, he would say- you are crazy" "I know I am, but I am your mother" I would answer and we would laugh together. I miss that.

I was going to the airport sometime last year and I just started crying- I knew I would never go to the airport and pick up Ken again. I walk around a department store this holiday season and see something that Ken would have thought was so cool, but sadly, I have no one to buy for. I miss seeing his eyes light up at Christmas.

No, going to the movies and watching Harry Potter doesn't feel the same anymore, but mostly I miss Ken.

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